Sleeping apart can actually be good for your health and good for your relationship. Sleep deprivation, poor quality sleep and insomnia are the cause of ill-health, both mental and physical. It also leads to instability in relationships and problems with parenting.
Over the last decade or so, individuals have woken up (sorry) to the fact that their quality of sleep is paramount to their performance at work and to their overall well-being. We are no longer happy to accept sub-standard levels of sleep.
Relationships improve once people make the decision to split up their sleeping arrangements as morning grumpiness is alleviated; there’s no reason to blame the other for your bad night’s sleep. Also, if one half of the couple likes to read or watch TV into the early hours, but the other likes to be snoozling by 10pm and up at 6am, they can do so without disturbing each other.
Sleeping in Separate Rooms is Not New
My grandparents, both sets, slept apart. My maternal grandparents slept in twin beds in the same room for years because my grandmother was so slightly built that she would roll onto my grandfather’s back. Later his snoring became so much of a problem she sent him off to the spare room.
My grandparents, both sets, slept apart. My maternal grandparents slept in twin beds in the same room for years because my grandmother was so slightly built that she would roll onto my grandfather’s back. Later his snoring became so much of a problem she sent him off to the spare room.
My paternal grandparents slept at separate addresses, even thouh they neuiver actually split up. It was a case of practicalities. They each had health issues and so my grandma was cared for by her daughter, my aunt. My granddad lived with his brother and sister and they all looked after each other.
What About the Social Stigma?i
It’s certainly true that people will look at you slightly askance if you admit to sleeping separately. Yet some couples say it has enabled them to stay together — look how many say that their partner’s snoring was the cause of their break-up. When you are in separate rooms, perhaps with some soundproofing, it’s no longer an issue. Many, women in particular, say they would love to get a decent night’s sleep away from their restless partner.
Anyway, remember that your private sleeping arrangements are no-one’s business but your own.
It’s certainly true that people will look at you slightly askance if you admit to sleeping separately. Yet some couples say it has enabled them to stay together — look how many say that their partner’s snoring was the cause of their break-up. When you are in separate rooms, perhaps with some soundproofing, it’s no longer an issue. Many, women in particular, say they would love to get a decent night’s sleep away from their restless partner.
Anyway, remember that your private sleeping arrangements are no-one’s business but your own.
Gotta love a bed date. Photo by Toa Heftiba on Unsplash
Sleeping Apart is Romantic
While we all enjoy our snuggles with our partner, actually sleeping through the night is another thing. Hence it’s fun to sneak into each other’s room for romance, or plan ‘bed dates’. Then it’s so relaxing to go back to your own room and snooze peacefully – all night. No-one pulling the duvet off you, or keeping you awake with impossibly loud snoring. My own fault is that I chatter in my sleep, often loudly, telling my dog to ‘Stay!’ in my dreams. At that time, we didn’t even have a dog. Not good when my partner has to get up for work at 4am.Schedules
Sleeping Apart is Romantic
While we all enjoy our snuggles with our partner, actually sleeping through the night is another thing. Hence it’s fun to sneak into each other’s room for romance, or plan ‘bed dates’. Then it’s so relaxing to go back to your own room and snooze peacefully – all night. No-one pulling the duvet off you, or keeping you awake with impossibly loud snoring. My own fault is that I chatter in my sleep, often loudly, telling my dog to ‘Stay!’ in my dreams. At that time, we didn’t even have a dog. Not good when my partner has to get up for work at 4am.Schedules
Disparate Schedules
And that’s another thing. Varying schedules can cause havoc with sleeping patterns. Being woken by your hubby stumbling around the bedroom in the early hours, while you’ve still go at least another three hours of blissful oblivion left is a total pain. Especially if blissful oblivion quickly recedes into ‘it’s never gonna happen, so you may as well get up.’
Personally, I often find that when I can’t sleep and my mind is busy, its the best time to get creative. So I grab my notebook and laptop and use the time to write. It’s the best way for me to download my thoughts and eventually slide into a deep sleep. I couldn’t do that if I had to consider my poor man next to me who has to get up so early.
And that’s another thing. Varying schedules can cause havoc with sleeping patterns. Being woken by your hubby stumbling around the bedroom in the early hours, while you’ve still go at least another three hours of blissful oblivion left is a total pain. Especially if blissful oblivion quickly recedes into ‘it’s never gonna happen, so you may as well get up.’
Personally, I often find that when I can’t sleep and my mind is busy, its the best time to get creative. So I grab my notebook and laptop and use the time to write. It’s the best way for me to download my thoughts and eventually slide into a deep sleep. I couldn’t do that if I had to consider my poor man next to me who has to get up so early.
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